Pairing: Hanchul of course with another character
Summary: Super Juniors ten year reunion and two people haven't seen each other in a long time
Many steps had been taken to arrive to this point. He was not going to back out now. He was going to knock on that hotel door and see his face and deal with the rage he knew was bound to come.
The door opened and he remembered he should probably breathe before he passed out.
He saw the face he had only seen in pictures, videos and TV shows for the past five years. You tube had decided that he was the only person he wanted to see so his homepage was filled with clips from all the years of him performing.
“Wow didn’t expect you’d actually show up for this. How did you know what room was mine anyway.”
“I asked ZhouMi we have still kept in touch through the years.”
“Well how nice you kept in touch with someone in the group could have answered the countless emails, messages and shit I sent you. I guess you want to come in then tell me how wonderful your life has been since you left us high and dry.” Heechul slid the door open and let Hangeng pass him before closing the door rather loudly.
Heechul still had his temper apparently. He knew it wouldn’t be easy to just show up at his hotel door after five years of not speaking. ZhouMi had begged him to come though for the reunion, he insisted it was important that he show up for their ten-year anniversary. After all wouldn’t it be silly that everyone was going to be there and he wasn’t going to show up. He just wanted to see Heechul before actually appearing for the program he didn’t want an explosion in front of people but a private one.
“ I did what needed to be done Heechul and as for not answering any of your messages I was just too scared at the time. I couldn’t face all the hurt I had caused the group especially the hurt I caused you and when you stopped writing I had figured you had finally moved on with your life and where happy.”
“Well come out on the patio I’d rather have this discussion in private if you don’t mind.” Heechul escorted Hangeng to the patio overlooking Seoul. It really was a beautiful city he had missed it all these years but was too chicken to back out of his convictions. They sat down on the plastic furniture and Heechul poured glasses of soju for the both of them. Heechul handed a glass to Hangeng.
“I don’t drink anymore Heechul, it puts too much stress on my system to handle it.”
Heechul looked up from the glass there was a slight look of concern but with a blink the cold stare was back. He turned himself into the calm cool collected persona he always carried on stage.
“Are you going to be on the program tomorrow?”
“Yes it was going to be a surprise the broadcaster had worked with ZhouMi to get me to come here. It took ZhouMi a lot of time and effort to convince me to come to the point of begging. I wanted to see you first though I didn’t want it to be shock.”
“I’m not the same person anymore Hangeng I can handle change and shock you sought to that when you left. I’ve had to deal with things on my own for the past five years.“ Heechul tipped the glass to his lips and drank the liquid quickly putting the glass down and pouring himself another.
“I didn’t do it to hurt you, you know. The last thing I wanted to do was leave you but I couldn’t keep going on like I did. I would have died Heechul I was not well and I needed to get out of the situation. It could have been very different if they had worked a better solution for me but they refused.”
“I would have left with you, you know I was so naïve then to think that you actually loved me.”
“I love you Heechul I always did. I couldn’t have you leave the group though. I know how much they all meant to you and that it would kill you to leave them and then you would resent me for the rest of your life. I didn’t want that hanging on my shoulders while I was trying to get myself well. I wanted you to be happy doing what you loved and not resenting the man who made you leave it all behind.”
“ I wouldn’t have resented you I loved you damnit. You were more important to me than the group I could have dealt with it, as long as I had you I would have been fine.” Heechul had gotten up and stood at the railing looking out at the scenery. He was not going to shed another tear for this man who had walked out on him five years ago.
“You would have resented me, you love the stage. You’re a performer and you needed that rush every night I couldn’t take that away from you. I loved you too much to have you destroy your career like that if it was going to go sour with SM I wasn’t going to bring you down with me. I needed to leave for my health that was the only reason I left. It wasn’t for money or to go solo it was to get well again. I didn’t do anything after I left, I still live with my parents after all these years.” Hangeng stood up and walked over to Heechul he stood behind the man just watching him inhale and exhale sharply to keep himself from showing any emotion. Heechul had never changed he could still read him like it was five years ago.
“You destroyed me by leaving I couldn’t love again like that. I was so broken after you left I think I went mad Leeteuk was ready to commit me I think.” Heechul laughed a little and turned to look at Hangeng. He didn’t look so weak anymore but his eyes were still as dead as they were when he walked out of the dorms all those years ago. Heechul walked up to Hangeng and embraced him he couldn’t help it he wanted the man near even after all this time. His heart still pulled him right to where it always belonged. Hangeng put his arms around him and Heechul let one tear leave his eyes before he looked up at Hangeng and brushed his lips against his. He still tasted so sweet and his lips were still as soft as ever, he had longed for this so many hours at night, when he was alone in his room.
All too quickly the kiss had ended and Heechul noticed a person standing behind Hangeng, now he really felt like total shit. He pulled away from Hangeng quickly and walked over to his wife. She only smiled at him, she had known for quite some time that his heart really only truly belonged to one person but he held her in a different part and he was a good husband.
“Geng, I’d like to introduce my wife Michelle. Michelle this is an old friend Hangeng.” He put his hand along her back and guided her to the man standing there with surprise clearly written all over his face. She was beautiful she looked very young compared to Heechul. She couldn’t be more than in her early 20’s.
“Its nice to finally meet you. I came out to see if you two wanted anything to eat or anything to drink other than Soju. If not I think I’m going to go over to Donghae’s room and see his wife and the baby.” The men both shook their heads no. She walked through the glass doors and she could be heard leaving the hotel room altogether quietly not slamming not raging as would be expected. Hangeng was very surprised by this behavior, shouldn’t she have been upset?
“I met her on a trip to the states, she’s a writer, she’s way younger than me but she gets me. We spread our time between here and the states. She’s good friends with Donghae’s wife. Nothing really shocks her if you were wondering she knows who you are. I’m actually surprised she was so calm about it too but she never ceases to amaze me I guess that’s why I married her.” Heechul although for all his nonchalance’s looked toward the doors he obviously cared for the woman greatly.
“I thought you said you could never love again?” Hangeng asked and regretted it the second the sentence fell from his lips. He knew it was a very spiteful thing to say but he had waited all these years for some hope with Heechul that maybe he would show up at his doorstep. It was stupid to think this way since he didn’t answer any of his messages but he thought once Super Junior died down maybe he would look for him. Hell he still lived in the same house he did when he was in Super Junior. His mother kept telling him everyday to get married already she was tired of taking care of him.
“I could never love anyone the way I loved you but when you get older you need companionship and she’s not a man so its different. She has her own money so I know she wasn’t after the fame or anything. She deals with my craziness and I love her for it.”
“So Donghae has spawned apparently?”
Heechul laughed and Hangeng smiled.